So what exactly is a miracle? According to Wikipedia, as if that were the expert on such things, a miracle is a "perceptible interruption of the laws of nature, such that can be attempted to be explained by divine intervention." This seems to fit with the discussion in my college philosophy class approximately 13 years ago: I recall a miracle being defined as God doing something outside of the laws of nature that he created. But if God created the "law", isn't that a miracle in and of itself?
Biblically speaking, miracles are easy to identify. God causes an enormous body of water to divide, allowing his people to walk across on dry land, only to have it collapse on their enemies. Jesus calls to his friend to come out of the tomb, and he comes back to life. Peter and John tell a crippled man to arise and walk, and he not only does that, but leaps and dances, praising God.
So it seems that we tend to have this picture of God "doing stuff", like his "regular routine", I guess, and then, at certain times he does "other stuff" which we deem as miraculous. But lets stop and think about that for a second. Is it "routine" just because He's God? He spoke, and the world came into being. That's miraculous! He breathed into Adam and Eve and gave them not only life, but purpose. That's miraculous! He "thought up" flesh and bone, organs and tissue, genes and cells and mitochondria. If that isn't miraculous, I don't know what is. So then, is it only miraculous when God takes away our sickness, or is it miraculous simply that an egg and a sperm come together and form exactly the person that God intends? Maybe a miracle is any act that God performs that reminds us that He is sovereign.
It's a miracle that Ava is here. Without getting too much into menstrual cycles, ovulation, and conception... it's a miracle, just trust me on that one. Of course we are all praying for a "bigger" miracle. But it is a miracle that she is still with us right now. She should have already died several times. Every day that we wake up and still have her is a miracle.
So, let me bring you up to speed, clinically speaking. Things are not looking good. Ava's lactate today is critically high (14). Her heart rate is up. She has been looking less comfortable to us, and is having almost no awake time lately. Our hearts are heavy. We are basically just waiting for a final "rubber stamp" on the muscle biopsy results, but the preliminary report has us knowing almost with certainty that Ava has a complex IV deficiency, which is exactly what Eric had and leaves no hope, medically speaking, of a positive outcome. We are still waiting for the final results of that test. The biopsy testing for mitochondrial depletion and Electron Transport Chain analysis has not begun as it has not yet been resent with the correct label for testing. We anticipate that it should be sent overnight today.
When Eric was here I prayed hard for a miracle with every fiber of my being, every minute of every day. After he died, and after some time gave perspective to the disease he had, I was left asking if a miracle was even ever possible. It is a genetic defect; it is the way that he was made. But does God still have power over that? Absolutely! After all, God "thought up" mitochondria, so he certainly has the power to fix broken genes and replicate mitochondria, if that is His will.
Of course this is what I want. I know that Ava is going to die- we all are. And God knit her together in the womb, knowing exactly her purpose and the number of days her earthly body would endure. I would sure like for this to be a miracle of "biblical" proportions, in which God demonstrates His power by completely restoring her, fixing her broken genes, and replicating her mitochondria., and so I still pray for that. But the hope that we have is rooted in the knowledge that God has already worked out our eternity ages ago with the most significant miracle in history:
That He, who was God himself, humbled Himself to take on human form, to be born, not as a king, but in a stable; As an adult was ridiculed, mocked, and beaten, though He was without fault; suffered, shed his blood and died a humiliating death on a cross as penalty for sin that was not his own; defeated that death and on the third day rose again, so that by belief in Him we might have eternal life...
...Miraculous.
Peace,
Allan
Monday, December 7, 2009
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Dearest Allan,
ReplyDeleteI am at a loss for adequate words to respond to your post. My heart overflows with love for all of you. I am sorry for the simplicity of my response. However, please know that it is deeply heartfelt.
Love,
Merrie Lee
Allan ~
ReplyDeleteThis post was so beautifully written. Thank you and Amy for inspiring us by your faith and trust in our Savior, the Sovereign One. We are walking beside you praying for that miracle - HE is the Great Physician....thinking of you all every day.
Love and prayers,
Faith
Dear Allan,
ReplyDeleteThank you for blessing me with the words you shared. Ava's life and your faithful walk through this time are a gift and challenge to all of us, those who believe and those who are not sure where they stand with their Savior.
I continue to pray that God's healing hand will move in Ava's body.
Continual in my prayers,
Rochelle
Allan, the entire way home from the hospital "peace" "peace" "peace" that was the only word in my brain. I had plans to come home and put "peace" as my fb status... i even came up with some pieces of art work (in my head to make later) that are surrounding the word peace.
ReplyDeletepeace be with you, i know it is,
as it is with me.
you and amy are amazing. your wisdom- which you have paid dearly to earn- oozes as you share it with us.
i feel each day with ava is a miracle. and each extra photo that was taken, as well- hoping with you.
love to you and amy and all of the bugs.
michelle